[humorix] Microsoft Acquires Humorix

[James Baughn <jbaughn@ldd.net>]

Microsoft Acquires Humorix
Bernhard Rosenkraenzer, bero@redhat.de
February 16, 2002

Immediately following our bankruptcy, Humorix received a
note from Nasdaq stating that Microsoft acquired all
available Humorix shares the moment the stock price reached
$0.00.  Since since our staff sold their employee stock
during the .com boom (I bought myself a nice CD-R medium
for my 10,000,000 shares!), Microsoft now owns 99.93% of
Humorix. 

The site will continue under the name of humoriXP. The Vast
Spy Network(tm) will be referred to as vastspy.NET in the
future.

But the news isn't all bad: Our hardware has seen massive
upgrades after the acquisition. Our web server -- formerly a
386SX using a 14.4 kBit/s dialup connection -- is now a
cluster of 10,000 8-way Pentium IVs with 2 Terabytes of RAM
each, and all on a 1 GBit/s net connection.

The cluster is running Windows XP though, which is why you
probably haven't noticed any speed improvements.

Also, all employees have been kept, though some were moved
to different positions. Noah Morals, obsoleted by
Microsoft's Vast Lawyer Network, is now our system
administrator (none of our techies wanted the job of running
around between the 10,000 servers and pressing the Reset
button on every bluescreen). Unconfirmed reports from
vastspy.NET claim Noah lost 4 pounds on the first day in
his new job.

We hope to continue bringing you only the most sincere and
serious fake news.
--
Humorix:      Linux and Open Source(nontm) on a lighter note
Archive:      http://mail.nl.linux.org/humorix/
Web site:     http://www.i-want-a-website.com/about-linux/