[humorix] Humorix Employees Go On Strike!

[James Baughn <jbaughn@ldd.net>]

Humorix Employees Go On Strike!
October 16, 2000

HUMORIX WORLD HEADQUARTERS -- Shouting "Hell no we won't
code" and "Show us the money!", the entire staff of
Humorix, including the Vast Spy Network(tm), went on strike
earlier today.  

"We're sick and tired of this crap," said G. E. Trich,
Humorix's Investor Relations Liason & Executive Book
Cooker. "We work long hours for no pay.  It's just not
fair!"

Humorix owner James Baughn didn't seem very concerned about
the whole affair.  "Finally, something I can write about!"
he exclaimed.  "After suffering from writer's block for the
last three weeks, I'll finally be able to publish
something."

The Union Of Pipe-Fitters, Air Conditioning Repairmen, and
Fake News Humorists Chapter #423 has agreed to participate
in the strike, sending in dozens of people to picket in
front of the ten-story World Headquarters building.

While at the picket line, Humorix lawyer Noah Morals
announced, "We're not going back to work until our demands
are met. First, the coffee machine in the third-floor
lounge needs to be fixed. Second, the Olympic-size swimming
pool on the fifth-floor should be heated.  Third, we should
get paid an actual salary instead of stock options that are
worth maybe .0000000001 cents per share."

Vast Spy Network(tm) member Double-Oh-Zero chimed in,  "And
we should be able to write fake news articles and opinion
pieces about any geeky topic, not just Microsoft bashing or
Linus worshipping.  And would it kill you to upgrade the
bandwidth into our offices from a T3 to an OC-48?"

In rebuttal, James Baughn said, "Who cares?  You're all
fictional characters anyways.  I can easily replace Jon
Splatz with a  John Fatz... and Noah Morals with a Philip
Mepocketz.  So there!"

-
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