[humorix] World Domination, One CPU Cycle At A Time

[James Baughn <jbaughn@ldd.net>]

World Domination, One CPU Cycle At A Time
July 31, 2000

Forget about searching for alien signals or large prime
numbers. The real distributed computing application of the
year is "Domination@World", a program to advocate Linux and
Apache to every single website in the world that uses
Windows and IIS.

The goal of the project is to probe every IP number to
determine what kind of platform each Net-connected machine
is running.  "That's a tall order... we need lots of
computers running our Domination@World clients to help
probe every nook and cranny of the Net," explained Mr. Zell
Litt, the project leader.  

After the probing is complete, the second phase calls for
the data to be cross-referenced with the InterNIC whois
database.  "This way we'll have the names, addresses, and
phone numbers for every Windows-using system administrator
on the planet," Zell gloated.  "That's when the fun
begins."

The "fun" part involves LART (Linux Advocacy & Re-education
Training), a comprehensive program for extreme advocacy. 
As part of LART, each Linux User Group will receive a list
of the Windows-using weenies in their region.  The LUG will
then be able to employ various advocacy techniques, ranging
from a soft-sell approach (sending the target a free Linux
CD in the mail) all the way to "LARTcon 5" (cracking into
their system and forcibly installing Linux).

We asked another Domination@Home leader about the moral and
privacy implications of their project.  "There's certainly
some ethical dilemmas with this," he admitted. "But that
hasn't stopped the FBI from using Carnivore to build
dossiers on people they suspect could be national security
risks. Meanwhile, we'll be using Domination@Home to build
dossiers on people who represent network security risks
since their servers run Windows. So what's the difference?"


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